I know we parted our separate ways, but I can’t keep lying to myself anymore.
I’m lost without you.
And frankly, I don’t recognise myself without you anymore.
I’ve replaced you with someone else. Someone bigger, bulkier and not someone I’d usually go for.
But it’s what the cool kids were doing, so I jumped on the bandwagon and found myself a new boy toy. Samuel Galaxy was his name.
I just wanted someone who could do the job better. Someone new and improved. Someone with endless possibilities. And yeah, someone who could last longer, too.
I tried to readjust, but it just didn’t seem to work out.
Yep, iPhone, you left a great big hole unfilled in my heart. And I’m begging you to come back.
I miss the way you let me sleep in peace. The way we were so in sync. When it was time for me to shut out the world and get some serious zees in, you had my back. You were quiet, you kept your distance. You didn’t let anyone disturb that sacred shuteye for me. And I loved you for it.
I miss our texts. You were always keen for me to chat for hours and I would never get tired of it. There was no inaccuracy, no delay: we were always on-point. It was as though you could finish the end of my sentences. We were compatible. And, you’d never start talking to me in another language all of a sudden, leaving me dazed and confused, begging to start over.
I miss how you didn’t leave everything hanging out.
It’s getting embarrassing. Flaps out, don’t care. I’m not used to this level of public indecency, and I don’t think I should have to adjust either.
Is it even that sanitary? Surely not.
And when it’s not in properly, well the whole world has to be notified about it, don’t they?
It just seems like a lot of hard work.
But you, iPhone. You were cool, calm and collected. You knew the goods were hidden inside, you just didn’t have to fling it around for the world to see. And I respect that.
So please, dear iPhone, I know I had my doubts, but time has only made this heart grow fonder.
Come back to me with that simplicity and compatibility. We did good together.